old people

i've run out of cash, and since the uk nurses & midwives council are taking forever to register me, i've been working as a health care assistant. my day consists of chasing demented old people around the ward and making them have a bath/meal and cleaning up poo.
after my first week of HATING it with a passion, i've settled into a defeated state of acceptance. i'm starting to warm to the old dears. theres this one tiny old lady millie, 90*, known to spontaneously deliver a musical version of 'jack and jill'. yesterday she told us several times that her lunch money was stolen, and she really must go home because her mum is expecting her home from school. we explained that she's staying with us for a while but she sporadically cries help! (in a non-distressed way actually) to which one of the other nurses replies in song "i need sombody"...help! "not just anybody" and everyone has a laugh.
they can be quite naughty, these elderly women. theres another, more mobile old lady, aggie*, who every morning sweetly insists "oh no i had a lovely bath last night thankyou, they were ever so helpful" which is never true. you have to catch her off guard when shes wandering around the ward with her zimmer frame, lead her innocently into the shower and tell her to take a seat, but that only works every now and then.
on the odd day when i imagine getting old (rather than dying glamourously for some noble cause at some pre-senile age) i think i wouldn't mind being a "pleasantly confused" but feisty little old lady.


*names changed and artistic liberties taken with 'the facts', so relax you confidentiality freaks :)